Jennifer Garner Gets The Highest Praise From Her Husband!

by Kathy Sykes on April 9, 2013 · 1 comment

 

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I remember watching Ben Affleck’s Oscar acceptance speech where he was overcome with emotion for winning the award and then for  being appreciative of having a wife that “hung in there” with him through the ups and downs of marriage.

Ben just publicly laid it out there, with authenticity and transparency, that Jennifer put in the hard work for ten Christmases (which is I guess how they measure the length of their relationship) to work on their marriage. He said that “yes, it is work” and they have made it work for them. I teared up when I heard him say that because he was so honest and real about the importance of his marriage and that it “meant” something to him.

More often than not, couples put on a united front that things are perfect in their marriage, especially celebrities. But if we were all to be honest, IT IS WORK! Marriage (or a peaceful, respectful, loving relationship) takes effort and does not happen naturally. That is one of the biggest misconceptions about marriage. Nothing worth having in this life comes without a conscious decision to work towards it.

Many people who heard Ben’s speech thought that he was admitting to marital problems in their relationship. But his wife stated that

“I know Ben, I knew he meant it as the hugest, warmest compliment in the world,” The Odd Life of Timothy Green star, 40, tells The Telegraph.

“I think he was saying, ‘Look, what we have is really real and I value it above all and I’m in it with you and I know you are in it with me.’ That’s the way I took it.”

And I believe that is what most married women thought as well. And the beauty of the whole thing is that he said it “out loud”. Bravo to Ben Affleck.

Another fabulous thing about Jennifer and Ben’s relationship is that they show a balance and selflessness that has to come with two working parents who love their careers.

Jennifer says:

“I definitely work less because Ben is so busy, but we have three kids, that’s just part of the deal,” she explains. “I want to be a mom. I’m happy for him that he’s as energized about work right now as he is.”

But according to the mom-of-three, the roles will soon be reversed. After starring in only a handful of films over the last few years, she’s staking claim on this summer, suggesting it will be her comeback to the big screen.

“Ben’s always saying, ‘You need to work. It’s a part of you and you’re a different person when you’re working,’” Garner shares. “I’ve reserved this summer [for work]. It’s mine.”

She continues, “I feel a bit like poking my head out of the fog. It’s been a lovely mishmash of fog, but I feel my turn is ’round the corner. I don’t know what it’s going to be, but I’m ready for it.”

I believe that it is essential for each person to allow their partner to be the individual they are meant to be, continue to grow as a person, and support them in their efforts. If a spouse is fully happy as an individual, it will only bring joy and happiness into the relationship.

I can speak authentically to this subject because when I married a pastor, I changed or eliminated some of the things that I loved to do. These were not things that were unpleasing to God, but I just took it upon myself to try to be “something else”. That was a big mistake. I felt imprisoned and began to feel resentment. Also, having a pastor as a husband can “be” or “seem” very “him focused”. And that makes it impossible to have balance.

Ten years into the marriage, I have learned to let him be himself and allow the true beauty and vitality of who I am be front and center. Again, it takes verbal communication and effort for things to work (and sometimes not smoothly). But if both spouses have a clear understanding of love, respect and accountability, things can work out for the best of everyone involved.

I am impressed by couples who can tell their true stories and it encourages others to be their true selves.

 

 

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{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Linda Kirk April 9, 2013 at 5:01 pm

SMILING

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